It’s certain

That I feel uncertain

I want to close the curtains

Retreat within

But the darkness scares me

More than the light

I feel like I’m living under a microscope

Where every second a new needle is thrust through me

Leaving me anything but whole

Just creating fresh wounds

That nobody seems to care about but me

Medicine they say

It’s the answer to all your problems

But have you read the list of side affects?

Sleeplessness

Loss of mood

Decreased appetite for life

All are ripe fruit from what few branches I have left to give from

But still people to come offering shade await tomorrow hold gleaming axes of judgement and the purity of having lived a completely unremarkable life of anonymity

While so few seem to care how desperately I need to be replanted

Just take two placebos and call me lame I guess

I’ll just keep pumping out the volume

Of A+ blood from my veins

While Mick Jagger tells me I can bleed on him

Meanwhile my band-aid box is empty

And all I have left to show is a scar on my fingertip and a stake through my heart to remind me that there’s people who have my back stabbed calling me their best friend

Aloha Bitches.

Such a quality word.

Hello.

Goodbye.

I love you.

Just like life itself.

So short yet so packed with meaning.

I want to pack the bags I keep below my eyes and drift off to sleep like a ship that lost its anchor

But caffeine keeps me awake

And paranoid.

My sleepiness paralyzed by prescription medication that Dr. Feelgood thought would make me feel good.

I…am not sick.

But I’m not well.

The only thing that’s certain is the uncertainty.

And that my friends, makes this all very uneasy.